The night was dark and misty, the town clock struck midnight. The bare, wintered trees loomed in the puffy fog, their branches like forks, motionless in the still night. The centrepiece of the lake was an old rickety boat with a mysterious figure occupying one of the seats.This picture was found at http://www.flickr.com/photos/latyrx/sets/72157623492608542/
Wow, what a truly beautiful piece of writing, Mollie. Did you only have 10 minutes to write this? You have used beautiful language that goes so well with the image.
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to seeing more of your writing.
Carol
PS Don't forget to give the proper attribution for the images you use.
What an imaginative piece of writing. Very descriptive and life-like. I look forward to more of your work ;).
ReplyDeleteHi Mollie
ReplyDeleteYou have created some beautiful imagery. I really like the trees - with their branches like forks - it makes them sound sharp, and unfriendly - setting the mood.
I want to know more about the mysterious figure!!!
Toni Twiss
Waikato University
I enjoyed reading your descriptive writing Molly. I especially liked the phrase, "The bare wintered trees.." I wasn't too sure about "puffy fog". It made me think of fog like a mallowpuff and I don't think that's what you meant. It's a great start though. I wonder if you plan to develop it into a full story. Ms Donnell Kaipara Flats
ReplyDeleteComment forwarded on behalf of skambalu from Twitter who was unable to comment directly to the blog:
ReplyDeleteOn Monday 24th May 2010, @skambalu said:
Well done Mollie - very atmospheric. I particularly like the "bare, wintered trees" - so much more active than "wintery" would have been! Something has really happened to them! I wonder what the shadowy figure in the boat will do now?